Something to entertain you while Im away entertaining myself...

 

Mwah Lilli xxx

 

Something just for fun....

1. Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels good.

2. Talk is cheap because supply exceeds the demand.

3. Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.

4. Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

5. Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They both should be changed regularly and for the same reason.

6. It's easier to fight for ones' principles than to live up to them.

7. I don't mind going anywhere as long as it's an interesting path.

8. Anything free is worth what you pay for it.

9. It hurts to be on the cutting edge.

10. If it ain't broke, fix it till it is.

11. I don't get even, I get older.

12. In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.

13. Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

14. I am a nutritional overachiever.

15. My inferiority complex is not as good as yours.

16. I am having an out of money experience.

17. I am in shape. round is a shape.

18. Practice safe eating - always use condiments.

19. A day without sunshine is like night.

20. If marriage were outlawed, only outlaws would have in-laws.

21. Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hair stylist you like.

22. The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

23. Time may be a great healer, but it's also a lousy beautician.

24. Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

25. You don't stop laughing because you grow old, you grow old because you stopped laughing.

LIFE'S OBSERVATIONS:

1. Marriage changes passion; suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

2. Sign in a Chinese Pet Store: "Buy one dog, get one flea."

3. I have my own little world. But it's OK, they know me here.

4. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

5. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

6. I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen too many of them get elected.

7. The most precious thing we have is life. Yet it has absolutely no trade-in value.

8. I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

9. Shopping tip: You can get shoes for a couple of bucks at the bowling alley.

10. I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect.

11. How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

12. Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool?